Here’s the number 1 excuse for people who don’t move toward their dreams.
“I don’t have time.”
I’ve got a job to go to and children to feed and friends to convince that I’m still the same boring old me. Between all of that, there’s no time left for going after big dreams and turning them into reality. I guess it’s just going to be an impossible dream for me.”
I’m sure you’ve heard it all before. And I’m sure you’ve made the same excuse you have a lot of times before. I for one know I have.
On the surface of it, it sounds like a valid excuse. Especially for people like us, we like to fill our days with endless tasks and trinkets that make us look and feel productive. Productivity is our middle name, after all, and we can’t be bothered sitting idle on our butts twiddling our thumbs while the rest of the world watches reality TV or plays video games on their phones.
So we go after little goals or, worse, goals the rest of society expects us to go after, and we dedicate our entire lives to the achievement of these goals. All the while, there’s this little thing at the back of our head, niggling and nagging at us before we shoo it away so we can focus on the tasks of the day.
“Hey, did you remember this isn’t really what you signed up for?
Hey, you know there’s more to life than this, so why are you still settling for this?
Hey, you know where this is going, don’t you? Pretend that this is what life is all about only to fall back into a dead-end ditch a few months from now?”
How many times have you done that? How many times have you fallen flat on your face, anxious and depressed because you know in your heart of hearts you’re not doing what you were meant to be doing? And how many times have you risen again, only to focus your sights on a new thing, on another goal that on the surface seems to be the thing you were meant for but you know deep in your heart really isn’t?
We all have that thing, that thing that sets our heart alight and our souls on fire. It’s not always easy to admit to ourselves what that one thing is. And, sometimes, it can hurt like hell to open up our lives and allow that one thing to fully fill up and saturate us. It’s not fun writing from the heart. I don’t look forward to every day cutting my heart open and bleeding like a dead man. But it’s when everything has bled and the blood has dried up that I feel reborn, renewed, alive again.
So that’s what I did. I opened up my life to create space for the cutting up of the heart. Every day, I sit here like one damned determined duck and allow the heart to bleed once more. I can’t do anything less. I’ve tried everything less. I’ve tried everything less a lot of times and it blew up into smithereens in my face.
It’s not hard to make space for that one thing, you know. You know you can find the time and space in your life for it. You know there are plenty of things in your life you can easily do without. I don’t have to name them, but I’ll do it anyway—social media, TV that you don’t like, TV that you actually like, fussing around the house and making sure every little rug and coaster is in straight order, meeting up with people you secretly hate and allowing them to overstay their welcome in your life, sitting on your ass thinking and overthinking and pretending you’re meditating. The list goes on and on.
Those were the things I threw out the window. I’m sure there’s plenty of other things you can think of. But even with these things in our lives, there’s really not much reason why we can’t make time for our dream life.
Here’s a quick lesson from quantum physics. There is no such thing as time or at least time as we know it. We think of time like this giant river flowing forward and always forward. There’s the past, the present, and the future. And often, people spend their lives either reliving the past over and over again or worrying about a future that isn’t even there.
And yet, new research shows time doesn’t just flow forward, it flows backward as well. Whichever way time goes, there’s still only one thing that remains. The present. This moment. Now. The past no longer exists or has yet to exist. And it’s the same with the future. It’s no longer there or it’s not there yet.
So all our complaints about how we don’t have time or how we don’t know how to manage time are basically moot and academic. For there is no time, at least there is no time like the way we think there is. There is no past to kill ourselves over for a hundred million times. There is no great river always carrying us forward, forward, ever forward.
There is only now. There is only this moment. There is only this one breath, and behind that the little knowing that there could be a next or there could be none. This now here is your life. It’s your entire fucking life compressed into a single point in space-time. You’re carrying with you memories from the past and hopes for the future, but you also have with you everything else you need to live a life your heart truly desires.
Now is your chance.
Now is your moment.
Now is truly the only thing you have.
Now is where you open up space and allow your dreams to fill you up.